DCH

Q) If Farhan Akhtar had made a movie starring Aamir Khan, Akshaye Khanna and Saif Ali Khan about a slapping heart, what would he call it?


A) Dil chata hain

share ware

Q: Why do people in the indian stock markets often go crazy and do random trading?
A: Blame it on the BSE
Clearly, not many would understand. This should hopefully help :P

Lord of the Rings

Courtesy Jose.

Why should you let the phone ring exactly 9 times?


(Ans) ... because 9 rings for mortal men :-/

anti-semantics

q) how many kinds of jews are there in the world?
a) 2... the bad jews and the gu-jjus

courtesy Panda. (not the asexual cute one....the other panda)

Changli's revenge

For a brief background on the 'joke', see this.



Characters copied from here.

army jokes

Q) If Konkona Sen and Salman Butt were to go on a war with each other, what would they call their armies?

A) Konkona Sena and Salman Buttalion.

P.S: The same holds true if Konkona Sen and Vinod Bollini were to go on war.

namkeen (courtesy chitra)

Q) Namkeen Peanut was in love with Moongphalli, The police constable saw them together and arrested Peanut. Why?

A) He was as-salting her.

Prez's Pillow

Q. Prez APJ Abdul Kalam is in the habit of remembering and speaking his pillow's name every now and then. Why?

A. After all its his Takiya-kalam

Jail ki sazaa - Chai piyo

Q: There's this prison where prisoners are tortured and treated badly and made to work out in the sun. And then when they're thirsty, they're not even given cold water :( . What is this prison's name?
A: Sazaa-E-Sadapaani

Q: If it snows in Assam, what will one get if he sits under a tree?
A: Iced Tea

(Both courtesy Ankur Kulkarni and Shankaran)

Chipko movement

Q: What would you call a pervert tree hugger?
A: 'Ped'-ophile
(inspired by a tree outside H9 - no reason, just generally ...)